Man Cries For Help As His Lollipop Wont Work On His Girlfriend

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His sleeping lollipop has caused him nothing but pain and heartbreak! “Not even watching p~orn can wake it up,” said Alpheus Mokou (41) from Mamatsha Village in Ga-Molepo, Limpopo.

He said he has already lost two girlfriends since his lollipop stopped reporting for duty. Alpheus said the trouble started after he broke up with his ex-girlfriend in 2013.

“She befriended me and forced me into bed.

“I didn’t have a girlfriend at the time.

“We had se~x whenever she paid me a visit. My lollipop never disappointed me,” he told Daily Sun.

“But then she broke up with me for no reason. She just left without offering an explanation.”

A few months later Alpheus found a new girlfriend, but his new love was short-lived. “I realised my lollipop wasn’t working during se~x.

“I would just pretend to be bored, but deep inside I was very worried.”

Alpheus supects his first girlfriend did something to him.

“The way she threw herself at me before dumping me like a hot potato is very suspicious.”

He pleaded with the People’s Paper to help him solve his problem.

He added that any help would be appreciated and he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his life a lonely bachelor. If you would like to help Alpheus, you can call 072 414 9419.

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